You should have enough self-control and enough respect for your partner to not even go there. There are good people ..you are one of them, I am one of themWe need to keep fighting and believing for those of us out there who do care. I thought we had a decent marriage. You knew I would do anything for those kids and yet you continue to prove our family will never be worth your time and effort or attention. Last Thursday in anger I took his remaining clothes to his home only to find another woman there preparing him dinner. My exwife left me for some guy she meet at a club and he choked her to death. Two still reside with us. in the last few weeks i have asked him one or twice if being with me is what he wants and he said of course and we have had some really lovely days together, the night before we split up we had not a blazing row as such but it was the way things were said that was the problem not what was actually said, he woke the next morning left for work and text me saying he thinks I should go back to my parents house, maybe the living together situation isnt working out and then began to say he thinks we shouldnt be together he doesnt know what he wants he loves me but hates the fact we keep arguing and dont seem to get along the way we use to. My ex left me the day after Christmas. A common example would be a major medical illness. The papers are signed. Been married 30 years. Any of these reasons could be applied to either partner in a relationship. My life is in a tailspin right now. She spent a few nights at his place and on new years eve she drove him home and spent the night. (2018). So made loads of effort to make her life more enjoyable. Just move through it, let your emotions flow freely, and dont let anyone make you feel like less of a person for feeling this way. Your story is so touching. But I have someone to thank for the life I currently have. He simply needs to find his happiness, he just wants to be happy. No matter what the true cause is, it is tied to your emotions. I caught her in an affair with a coworker and then found out she slept with my friend in my own home while I was asleep. Now she said she cant give me a second chance because she doesnt want to chance things going back to the way they are for her now also saying she needs to find a new man in front of the kids. Its awful. He finally said that he had met someone but that this person had nothing to do his decision was made. So sorry jason.My wife just left me after 28 yrs.I know the pain.Its time to find someone else.who will appreciate Then last weekend everything changed Its very sad but I want her happy. He is worried about more his material things than me or our marriage. Its rough but in the long run we will be better off. Write to Family Life, The Guardian . It's OK To Fake It A Little After Your Husband Leaves. I dont know how to handle this situation. Do not allow someone to ever make you feel less or wrong. It should never be based on how YOU are feeling thats selfish, not selfless. My virginity was stolen from me raped at the age of 14 by 2 people I thought were my friends. I said that i am going to the car and he followed me and said if you leave i am calling an attorney on Monday and i am so sick and tired of you. When I asked about it he began to av suspicious so I attempted to go look. As I realized in conversation with the neurologist I saw, often, when you are in protracted pain for a long time, your neurological system goes on automatic; its as if theres a signal for pain that gets stuck on ON!. Is this forum legitimate? Its these weekdays. She should not know what your settlement is.she is waiting for it. It might not seem this way, but maybe he just wasnt in love with you anymore. I built her flower boxes and a deck box, even a storage rack for her kayaks and canoe. The following morning I came across more items that appeared to be missing from the house again and when I was once again told that he had given items to family members without even discussing it with me, I became very upset and hurt. I still cant understand why, all this is happening. I would get upset but he insisted there was nothing wrong with it. I broke down and hit the ultimate low and the very next day she used it and stripped me of custody and I didnt get to see my kids for 7 months. We have a beautiful son together. I feel no small amount guilt for feeling relief at her leaving. Though I miss him and would love for him to be at home with us, he refuses to get psychological help Therefore, I believe its better hes gone. Im now 35. The gym for me kept me from drinking. For example, its typically easier to digest the idea that you and your partner grew apart than it is to consider the possibility that he or she fell out of love with you. Sadistic. It takes a brave man to walk out on his wife and kids. There is a Creator of the Universe who cares about you and wishes nothing but the best for your life. If your husband is gay, there will be no getting that love back. Mental illness alone is no excuse to break up with someone. Then the answer is simple she wasnt the one for me and it got me thinking how bad of a person she was to me . For the best part of a week I thought he wanted space. But most of the time do not want to come home. Take time to really get to know who you are dealing with. Its been hard. It is the little daily things that make life worth living and I know how to put you in the right perspective. While it . They often beg not to go back and cry that they want to stay with me just one more night. This is his second time. I have been abused by my father, I have been in relationships where I have been abused for many years. Hi man am so sorry to hear that even me am in the same situation last of last week i find my wife chat with guy sp when i ask her she was fighting and fighting but i cul her mum to talk with child but even kmw we still fighting so i dnt know what to do about this situation please guys i need advice she gave 27 years old and i have 29 year she have a kid i dnt have a kid, Hey Jason, Leaving on trips, not connecting when he was gone and making issues out of things instead of continuing to work on things. We have a daughter, and kids cant keep a marriage together. I havent overcome anything yet. Below, Borrello and other marriage therapists share the most common reasons men check out of their marriage and file for divorce. I am devastated. I then made the mistake of writing down what had happened to me when I was a child (I had, over the years, told my wife all of this this was my first time ever writing it down) and from completely out of the blue my wifes response was to say that she knows Im in pain over all of this but that she no longer loves me, and that she wants a divorce, and that she does not see us ever getting back together. Does he love her more then me? We had a good but quiet weekend. He made me quit my job because he said it didnt leave us with enough time to spend together and we bought a new car made me get rid of mine. They started talking all the time. They went thru my things and took things my mother gave me, when I finally was able to get what was left of my things they out garbage, household garbage, condoms, sex stuff in my things. I didnt understand it at all l would always tell him if you want to be with other people please jut let me know l do not wish to be a part of that. April 22, 2022, 1:05 am. He literally got off with everything and got exactly what he wanted. I saw people that appear to be in other countries on here. She moved out fast and said I needed time to work on myself as well. Tonight while in bed at my place we had an argument. His father, a minister, married us. 21 years of marriage, two kids been together since we were 22 and 21. He saw a friend of mine recently and told her that he was upset by the split and still really loved me but he wont talk. He is helpful, and proper, and considerate, and all of the communication between my lawyer and him, and paying everything early and is mister proper. But there isnt anything other than try to focus on your kids. That which works against you actualy works for you. Same situation, married 18 years, 2 girls.not sure if she had somebody else, but I have a feeling,,,wont talk to me at all. I threatened to call the police but never did out of fear of having anything to do with that kind of stuff and the kids. I have fantastic close friends and an even better-extended family. Im going through the same thing youre going through. it will come . Its a love that looks right., She asked us, Did you know he has Down syndrome? I was a little shocked. Btw He also says they wont get by with their adultery! See a priest????? Totally relate. Shes married with two children as well, and was in a comfortable marriage. How can I make myself feel better and sleep better? I just wish I had a reason. Youre alright We have two children whom are now adults, with the youngest being 18. It's Over. What Im trying to say is that it becomes about saving face. He says she cant stop him seeing me but I think she will. His response was that he thought about it and couldnt go through with it because he couldnt hurt me. This other guys life probably seems fresh and new, problem free, sexually attentive and like a vacation from her life. But some marriages can survive infidelity. I found that he had taken my key out of my purse for the car. When my kids are with me im fine but when they leave to go home it takes me at least an hour to get my head straight. The same applies to young men who can be fooled by a charming female sociopath/narcissist. Latter he leaves the house and stay for days, some times weeks without telling me his whereabouts. I was like how can you be so mean to me? Wife Abandonment - My husband suddenly left me. Hes dating without any problem Im sure. Trust me, I know how hard it can be to stay strong when youre sad and heartbroken. How can I do it? How can we say such things to each other, and then she goes away with him? For me, it was a kind of deadness. Spousal Abandonment Syndrome is when one of the spouses leaves the marriage without any warning, andusually-without having shown any signs of unhappiness with the relationship. Get pleasable. I know it will all get better over time I just worry about how much damage this is doing to the kids. And the week I left also happened to be the week we renewed our lease . I know how difficult it is and I know how sad it is because I am here too but I am six months out, and the realization that I c could be better off starting to hit me. I took this announcement very badly and as I had already opened up all that shit in my mind re the abuse, neglect, etc I had a breakdown and two days later I woke up to my 3-year old self holding onto an exacto blade knife in one hand and my penis in the other as I was attempting to cut that part off of me. Part of me suspects my wife is one of the mentioned types who craves new love all the time. She recently lost her father and she had hatred for her step mom not letting my wife have a relationship with her father. After 5 years together my wife left me to be with another man.I was recently diagnosed with serious health issues that are beyond my control and hereditary.She waited till I came from work and met me at the door.She had already quit her job and he was coming to get her. I cant sleep at night. How to cope: Work on taking responsibility for your part, forgiving yourself for what you could have done differently, and letting go of how you think it should have been. Be selfish. Read more inspiring stories of single moms: At 7 months pregnant, I found messages online to a dozen women, telling them he hated me, wished I was dead. If youre looking for a counselor that practices a specific type of therapy, or who deals with specific concerns, you can make an advanced search by clicking here: http://www.goodtherapy.org/advanced-search.html. He did, yet he got everything he wanted. He started changing as soon as he graduated. I just cant believe how active this board appears with people who are going through this. The hole in my chest is so vast. I dont want her raising my kids or even being around them. Depression is difficult to combat and resolve alone. He was asking for her number then the conversation ended. A couple days after New Years she finally agrees to let me come grab a garbage bag of clothes. Questions or concerns about the preceding article can be directed to the author or posted as a comment below. Wont hug me or show any affection whatsoever. Strung me along for 6 months while dating other woman. If he was the man for me he wouldnt of left me. Below, divorce attorneys and marriage therapists share the most damaging things you can say in a marriage and what you should say to your spouse instead. Obviously, you wanted to marry him/her and you knew that marriage was tough. I feel for you. I was willing and able to do what it took, but he was committed to the fact that it wouldnt work. I have a huge financial mess where I make more money than most people but I pay out so much. I was lost. 1. My husband of 20years has just told hes leaving me that hes not in love with me anymore and has been living a lie for the past year!! So as painful as it is for you think about that. It hit me like a ton of bricks. Im still just so hurt. Im going through the same although my kids are 9 And 11 years old he told me 2 days after Xmas Im not happy here anymore. Hang in there, Remember its not you at all, its him!!!! My husband left me as he fall o love with a woman online which he has never meet.
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